Hillary Clinton, acum parte din „the vast right-wing conspiracy”

In 2004 Democratii l-au desemnat la candidatura pentru presedentie pe cel care parea ca poate sa castige alegerile. Daca Democratii au invatat ceva din acel esec, lectia pare a fi: dimpotriva, incearca sa il nominalizezi pe cel care nu poate, niciodata, nici intr-o mie de ani, sa le castige.

E vorba de Hillary Clinton. Rugata duminca sa comenteze despre parerea unora cum ca ar fi prea ezitanta pentru a face fata dusmanilor Americii, Clinton a raspuns in felul urmator. „E drept, sunt multe pericole in lume, si in cuvintele domnului ziarist sunt multi <<oameni rai>>”, continuand retoric: „si intrebarea este, ce anume din experienta mea ma ajuta sa fac fata <<barbatilor rai>>?” Clinton a luat o pauza comica, subliniind poanta cu o privire plina de inteles, si audienta a priceput gluma, razand si aplaudand indelungat.

Absolutely Hillary-ous!!! Spre deosebire de candidatul anterior la presedentie, Hillary Clinton a spus bancul cum trebuie. Gluma e ca in engleza, ca si in romana, „men” poate fi atat „oameni” cat si „barbati”, atat cu sensul de oameni de sex masculin, cat si cu sensul de soti. „Evil and bad” sunt doua nuante ale cuvantului „rau”, prima malefica, a doua mai benigna. In folosul poantei, Clinton a schimbat cuvintele folosite de ziarist, din „evil men” in „bad men”, care aduce mai mult a „sot prapadit” decat a „dusman malefic”.

La cine altcineva s-ar fi putut referi Hillary Clinton? Newsweek, mereu binevoitoare cu Democratii, are aici o lista. Dupa evidentul loc intai, pe restul podiumului se afla Ken Starr, George W. Bush, Newt Gingrich si tipul ala care i-a pus piedica lui Hillary cand era in clasa a treia. Numai ca daca Clinton avea in minte pe oricare din acestia patru, in ce fel ar fi fost remarca ei o gluma? Cand a fost intrebata de reporteri cine e „bad man”, Hillary s-a aparat rugandu-i sa nu ii psihanalizeze gluma. Nu as vrea sa psihanalizez prea mult cerinta de a nu i se psihanaliza gluma, dar nu e psihanaliza unealta aia care descopera abuzurile de mult uitate ale cuiva din familia apropiata, cum ar fi, sa zicem, un sot?

Cu o lovitura absolut gratuita, dar bine tintita sub centura sotului, Hillary Clinton devine in mod oficial parte a acelei multimi de oameni care nu au avut iluzia ca Bill Clinton ar fi cavalerul fara de pata si prihana al noului Nou Camelot, sau, in cuvintele ei, parte din „the vast right-wing conspiracy”. Ii va aduce voturi? Probabil ca nu: celor de dreapta gluma le aduce aminte de unul din motivele mai puerile pentru care un Clinton la Casa Alba e o idee proasta (The Economist are o lista cu motive mai bune; obsesia cu socializarea medicinii e atat pe a lor cat si pe a mea), iar cei de stanga probabil ca se intreaba cine e candidatul asta ciudat care il ia peste picior pe marele Bubba.

7 Răspunsuri to “Hillary Clinton, acum parte din „the vast right-wing conspiracy””

  1. muckcelmic Says:

    Pentru cititorul atent:
    1) Desigur, nu sunt reincarnarea lui Silviu Brucan, si prin urmare nu stiu precis daca Hillary va fi vreodata presedinte, dar gluma asta nu are cum sa o sa o ajute.
    2) Am tradus mai putin precis textul relevant din engleza, incercand sa pastrez nuantele si ironia: „The question is, we face a lot of dangers in the world and, in the gentleman’s words, we face a lot of evil men and what in my background equips me to deal with evil and bad men,” Clinton said. She paused to gaze while the audience interrupted with about 30 seconds of laughter and applause.”

  2. Mos Grigore Says:

    Dear Abby:

    My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on
    me from the beginning, and, when I confront him, he
    denies everything. What’s worse, everyone knows
    that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also,
    since he lost his job five years ago, he hasn’t even
    looked for a new one. All he does all day is smoke
    cigars; cruise around and bullshit with his buddies
    while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our
    daughter went away to college he doesn’t even
    pretend to like me. He even hints that I may be a
    lesbian. What should I do?

    Signed, Clueless

    Dear Clueless:

    Grow up and dump him. Good grief, woman. You don’t
    need him anymore. You’re a United States Senator
    from New York. Act like one.

  3. Mos Grigore Says:

    http://i.euniverse.com/funpages/cms_content/6660/2008CC2.swf

  4. muckcelmic Says:

    Am crezut ca eu am inventat termenul „Hillary-ous”. Mai aveam unul si pentru Kerry: „Kerry-smatic”, dar asta o sa ramana nefolosit, pentru ca Kerry nu mai candideaza.

  5. Mos Grigore Says:

    Two weeks ago in up state New York, Senator Hillary Clinton was invited to address a major gathering of the American Indian Nation. She spoke for almost an hour on her future plans for increasing every Native American’s present standard of living, should she one day become the first female President.>

    She referred to her career as a New York Senator, how she had signed „YES” for every Indian issue that came to her desk for approval. Although the Senator was vague on the details of her plan, she seemed most enthusiastic about her future ideas for helping her „red sisters and brothers.”

    At the conclusion of her speech, the Tribes presented the Senator with a plaque inscribed with her new Indian name – Walking Eagle. The proud Senator then departed in her motorcade, waving to the crowds.

    A news reporter later inquired of the group of chiefs of how they had come to select the new name given to the Senator. Th ey explained that Walking Eagle is the name given to a bird so full of crap it can no longer fly.

  6. emil Says:

    super🙂

  7. Mos Grigore Says:

    All  three, Bill, Hillary & Al Gore go to Heaven.
           God  addresses Al first. „Al, what do you believe?” Al replies, „Well, I
            believe I  won that election, but that it was your will that I did not
           serve. And  I’ve come  to understand that now.” God thinks for a second and says,
           „Okay, very good.  Come and sit at my left.”
            God  then addresses Bill. „Bill, what do you believe?” Bill replies, „I
            believe in  forgiveness. I’ve sinned, but I’ve never held a grudge against
           my fellow man,  and I hope no grudges are held against me.” God thinks for a
           second and says,  „You are forgiven, my son. Come and sit at my right.”
            God  then addresses Hillary. „Hillary, what do you believe?”
            Hillary  replies, „I believe you’re in my chair.”

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